Most Memorable 2021

Looking back at 2021…the upheavals of 2020 continued: the COVID-19 pandemic, environmental/climate disasters, racial strife, and strident politics. This is the same list from my 2020 post; when I wrote it, I was optimistic about 2021…the year turned out to be worse in terms of unheaval. Even so – 2021 was still a good year…my personal experience overcoming the dramas happening in the country and world.

High drama times

• Strident politics. In my life there are two traumatic national events that I remember vividly prior to 2021: JFK’s assassination when I was in 4th grade and planes impacting the World Trade Center/Pentagon (9/11). The January 6th attack on the US Capitol is now on the list too. My feelings watching the events as they occurred on 1/6/2021 were like what I felt watching the events on 9/11/2001: surprise, horror, fear that the US was being attacked and would either be forever changed or cease to exist. January 6th was probably worse than 9/11 because the attack was coming from within. A bright note -  occurring shortly after this black one, was Amanda Gorman’s poem/performance at Joe Biden’s inauguration; kudos to her; I wish that the warm glow of that moment would have become more infused in the year. Now…almost a year later, the anxiety for the health of the US Democracy is still there…underlying everything else going on. It’s frightening that a vocal minority evidently does not want democracy to continue; they want to control the way votes are counted to ensure their candidate wins or if their candidate does not win an election, they want ‘officials’ to override the results (based on the state election laws recently passed/proposed).  

• Pandemic. At the beginning of 2020, the vaccines were just beginning to roll out; the trend looked very positive until the summer when it became more obvious that there were too many people refusing to be vaccinated….partly linked to politics in the country. Another drama that is at the intersection of politics and the pandemic is the increase in unruly passengers on planes – many times over the face mask requirement. The Delta variant and now the Omicron variant impacted the unvaccinated the most; at the end of the year, we haven’t surpassed the mid-January 2021 peak hospitalizations, but the Omicron variant cases have spiked very recently and the hospitalizations have started upward; more of the vaccinated are testing positive with the Omicron variant and having mild cases that don’t require hospitalization…the benefit of being vaccinated. It is so easy for misinformation to propagate…so many people that don’t question sources even if what they are hearing/reading does not seem plausible (i.e. that a drug to treat parasitic infections in animals would be an effective COVID-19 treatment) and individuals sometimes request that doctors provide the ineffective treatment! It must be incredibly stressful for medical professionals not only to treat increasing numbers of COVID patients (mostly that refused vaccination) but also to have patients that want to demand their own treatment again medical advise.

• Racial (or any people seen as ‘different’) strife. There have been some high drama cases (Chauvin, Potter) that have achieved accountability…but no solid indication that policing practices are changing yet. And the arguments over US history in schools and books in libraries seem to be reverting to Jim Crow era strategies in some instances…and have long lasting implications. There is an intersection with strident politics too: the laws pasted to reduce access to voting my minorities in many states.

• Environment/climate disasters. They are happening so frequently now that we are beginning to see them as normal…although the tornadoes that swept through Kentucky in December were unusual enough to made headlines. The financial impact of this ‘new normal’ is as devastating as the event itself. At what point will they overwhelm our economy?

Resuming road trips….seeing family.  As soon as I was fully vaccinated, I started traveling again but only to see family rather than for birding festivals or museums or national parks. Road trips are a way to travel with lots of control over interactions with other people. There were some big family events this year: a wedding and my daughter buying her first house; it was a great pleasure to be present for those and to be with my 90-year-old parents again! A big place: no one in the immediate family has tested positive for COVID so far…and we are continuing to be cautious.

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Medical catch up. In 2020 I had put off regular doctor’s appointments and the number of issues that came from the restart of regular checkups in summer 2021 was a bit more than I expected…particularly the cancer diagnosis. Fortunately, all the issues are very treatable…no indirect long term health impact from the pandemic.

CSA to farmer’s market. I anticipated that I would be traveling for weeks at a time to Texas so didn’t sign up for the CSA (Community Supported Agriculture) in 2021…but was pleasantly surprised by the offerings of our local farmers market. It is something I will remember about 2021.

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As 2021 ends - I am not as optimistic about 2022 as I was at the end of 2020 about 2021. January 6th (and aftermath) has fundamentally changed my perspective of democracy in the US. On a smaller scale - within my home and family, the resilience we all developed during 2020 has been sustained and may be permanent simply because we are so consciously aware that we need it!

Cancer Diary – Entry 6

A month of waiting for surgery and almost another month to go….assuming that the hospital does not become overwhelmed with treatment of COVID-19 patients and the surgery is cancelled/postponed. I am not anxious about the possibility….yet; my concern has been ramping up over the past few days with the hospitalizations in Maryland increasing and the indicators that the Omicron variant’s being more contagious than the Delta variant….and knowing that a lot of people are gathering for the holidays (more than last year….with vaccinations available, a lot of people made big plans for this year prior to Omicron emergence). By early January – the medical system could be very stressed. There is little I can do to improve the situation aside from staying healthy myself; I am trying to keep myself busy and focused on other things.

There was little in my activities this month on the critical path toward my surgery other than continuing to take the medication. The surgery date was moved forward by a couple of days and an appointment made for a pre-surgery COVID-19 test. I was glad there was a lull; I thoroughly enjoyed my daughter’s whirlwind visit (road trip for her) for Thanksgiving and then had time to focus on supporting my sisters’ from afar as my mother was hospitalized. Fortunately, the hospitalization was short, and the follow-up seems to be improving her condition rapidly; her quality of life is improving beyond what it was a month ago! And I am relieved that I didn’t need to make an unplanned road trip to Texas.

We ventured out for a walk around Druid Hill Park and through the Christmas lights at Brookside Gardens. Both were enjoyable outdoor experiences…good for our mental health. There are other outdoor activities we’ve planned…but on our own in uncrowded settings rather than organized events. The more we learn about Omicron, the more cautious we are becoming.

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It’s cold enough that I have ramped up indoor activities… another effort to avoid thinking too much about my cancer. I am spending considerable time on a Coursera course: Anatomy of the Upper and Lower Extremities (from Yale University). During the holidays, I spend more time cooking…making more complicated recipes and trying new things. And there are the regular things like Zentangle tiles and book browsing that I can ‘do more’ too. I’ve started buying flowers every time I got to the grocery store since the view from my window now is bare trees; on the plus side, the birds are easier to see.

Overall – this month of waiting has not been hard at all. At this point, my mental perspective is about the same as it was a month ago although I find myself bracing for the possibility of the increases in hospitalizations from the pandemic causing a postponement of my surgery…an event that would be a major setback from my perspective.

30 years ago – December 1991

In December 30 years ago – the month was dominated by the joys of Christmas with a two-year-old. There was a party for children hosted by the company I worked for where she got her face painted, a refusal to sit on Santa’s lap at a community ‘Donuts with Santa’, singing Jingle Bells to the new baby at her day care, doing a 6 day count down to Christmas putting plush ornaments from Del Monte on the tree (sweetie pea, reddie tomato, cubbie corn, lushie peach, precious pear, juicy pineapple)…culminating in a an overwhelming Christmas morning which we videoed. Her favorite items at first were a kazoo and watching our cat play with a catnip toy.  It was the most over-the-top amount of gifts in her life!

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Outside of the dominate theme – she was enjoying Peter Rabbit stories at bedtime…and then surrounding herself with her collection of plush toys to completely fill the bed. I sent an application for Montessori school for the next fall.

We didn’t have family visits like we’d had in previous months. One sister was settling into her new house. Another’s family had the flu, but it was over soon enough to allow for a happy Christmas with her 2-year-old and her pregnancy was doing well; she made and sent a pine cone wreath – which I still have. Another sister hosted a successful a party for her colleagues. My mother decided to work one more year as a teacher. I cooked a whole pumpkin for the first time…stuffed it with apples, cinnamon, and butter…yummy for all.

The overarching feeling: life being very good but happening too fast!

Thanksgiving

So much to be thankful for this Thanksgiving Day:

My family staying healthy through the pandemic

My daughter coming for Thanksgiving – the first time she has seen her Dad since before the pandemic

So much good food for the day – some traditional and some new this year (strawberry rhubarb pie and orange corn meal muffins)

Weather good enough for a walk after the big meal

A decoration for the front door that can be composted after the 2021 holidays

Happy Thanksgiving!

My Blog’s 10th Anniversary

I started my blog 10 years ago this month. It was part of my transition from being career focused for more than 40 years. And I’ve kept it going – it’s an enjoyable daily rhythm for me. I’m savoring my history of the past decade in this post.

The blog posts from 2011 included a trip to Longwood Gardens and a long road trip to Tucson, Arizona (with photos of rest stops along the way) where my daughter was in graduate school. I stated the gleanings of the week and enjoyed posting recipes and photographs of places I was visiting. The new technology was a Kindle Fire; I was making the transition from physical to digital books…it would take several more years to complete the transition and I’d graduated from the Kindle Fire to an iPad, Smartphone (and laptop) for reading. Some of my favorite posts form 2011 include: Recipe of the Week: Homemade Soup for a Cold Day, Water Lily Pictures, and 10 Cosmetics from the Kitchen.

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In 2012, I started the monthly ‘10 days of little celebrations’ and experienced the trauma of my parents getting older…beginning to experience substantial health problems. We added a bird feeder on our deck – visible from my office window and I started enjoying birdwatching through the window. Some of my favorite posts include: Birds from my Office Window, Gray Day Reflections, Yucca Seed Pods, and Ten Days of Little Celebrations - November 2012.

The next year I started the zooming and free eBooks posts. Over the years my camera’s optical zoom capabilities have improved dramatically and I enjoy using it to get better images. By this time, I was almost completely transitioned to digital books too. We made a road trip to Florida for a satellite launch at Cape Canaveral and I got my first close view of Sandhill Cranes in the Orlando airport cell phone lot waiting for my daughter to arrive. Some of my favorite posts close to that anniversary include: 3 Free eBooks - December 2013, Sandhill Cranes in Florida - November 2013, Herons in Florida - November 2013, and Zooming - December 2013.

In 2014, I started my effort to reduce the ‘stuff’ we had accumulated from living for more than 25 years in our house. My volunteer work has gradually increased…and would be easily sustained until the COVID-19 pandemic. Some of my favorite posts from the end of 2014 include: The Grand Cleanout - December 2014, December Sunrise, and Fall Field Trips.

The big event at the end of 2015 was our travel to the big island of Hawaii…including a day trip to the top of Maunakea. It was an wonderful experience but I find myself wondering if I ever want to take a long flight like that again.

2016 was our first birding festival – the Festival of the Cranes at Bosque del Apache. We also discovered the Bald Eagles at Conowingo Dam, closer to home. I started my monthly Zentangle posts. Here are some sample posts: Highlights of 2016, Conowingo - December 2016, Zentangle® – November 2016, and First Day at Bosque del Apache.

I started the monthly eBotantical Prints posts in November 2017. I’d been browsing historical botanical books in the last decade of my career and was beginning to figure out a way to share my list. At the time I thought that I had about exhausted the supply, but I’ve continued to add 20 or so books every month until there are now over 2,200 books on the list!

In 2018 we attended our second Festival of the Cranes in New Mexico then enjoyed the Space Coast Birding and Wildlife Festival early in 2019.

In the last few months of 2019, there was a last road trip with my parents at Thanksgiving. We enjoyed the Christmas lights near home and planned for a birding festival in Laredo, TX in the early part of 2020.

As we were coming back from the Laredo birding festival, COVID-19 was in the news and soon we were ‘staying at home as much as possible’. By November 2020, we were anticipating that a vaccine was going to become available and the pandemic would end. We were doing virtual birding festivals and otherwise keeping ourselves happy at or close to home.

And here I am in November 2021, still not like I was pre-pandemic. I enjoy many of the same things I have in the past 10 years, but I am not out venturing into crowds…not flying. I am facing a health challenge of my own (cancer). My parents are home bound in Texas, and I have made visiting them my rationale for 3 road trips since the spring when I became fully vaccinated. At this point, it is not the pandemic that causes most of my anxiety, but the changed behavior (sometimes abrasive and violent) of people under stress that has become so apparent over the past year.

The blog continues…it’s a way to document my present….and notice the subtle changes in the way I am ‘living well.’

90 Years

Both of my parents are 90 years old this year. I’ve been thinking about the events of their lives and what has happened in the world during their lifetimes.

Their lives began during the Great Depression. They were both born at home; both families were living in rural Oklahoma and grew most of their own food. They were too young to fully realize the stress around the country…secure with their family and small rural community.

Their school memories are from the 1940s --- the World War II era. Their fathers were too old to go to war so the impact of the war on their families was indirect…primarily the rationing programs. Both went to schools where there was only a small cohort at each grade level. Later in their lives they attended high school reunions occassionally – keeping in touch with that small group that had mostly scattered across the country.

They were in college in the early 1950s – the boom years with the GI Bill funding returning veterans and college being encouraged for those just graduating from high school. My parents were ‘first generation’ to college for their families. They married, left the farm, and had 3 of their 4 children during the decade. My dad’s career stayed related to agriculture initially – at first requiring a lot of traveling and then into management of grain storage.

By the 1960s, they were in Texas living in a small city…children in public schools, living in an air-conditioned house (an important thing in the Texas summer). The big health improvement was the availability of the polio vaccine (we all got the vaccine via sugar cubes at school) and the waning of smallpox around the world even though we were still required to get updated vaccines when we traveled to Mexico.  In the mid-60s my mother returned to college for a degree in education…a career she started in the 1970s. My dad’s parents moved from Oklahoma to the same small city in Texas.

In the early 1970s, they moved to a suburb of a big city. They bought a house that accommodated the whole family, including my dad’s parents. My dad had transitioned completely from an agriculture related career to financial management and planning. My mother was teaching. All 4 of their daughters graduated from high school and went to Texas colleges (the last one just starting at the end of the decade). One daughter got married. My parents’ fathers died during the decade. Somehow everyone managed to stay ahead of inflation and pay mortgages that were high interest compared to today.

The 1980s were a very busy decade with careers of the whole family in high gear. My father was coming adept at digital spreadsheets…my mother was focused on reading for students in upper elementary and middle school. The youngest daughter graduated from college. One daughter (me) moved halfway across the country to the east coast and two others got married. My maternal grandmother died. Toward the end of the decade, the first two grandchildren were born.

In the 1990’s, my parents retired from their careers; they travelled and took care of grandchildren and helped with home maintenance (a total of 5 houses in the family!). Three more grandchildren were born, and the older ones started school.

Similar activities continued in the 2000s changing as the grandchildren got older…the oldest ones starting college.

In the 2010s, travel and engagement with family continued in a similar way for the first part of the decade; by the middle of the decade someone else was doing the driving on road trips and they stopped driving completely by the end of the decade. My paternal grandmother died; she had been living in the same house with my parents since the 1970s. Health challenges began to emerge for both parents…intermittent at first and then slowing them down in the last years of the decade. They both benefited from cataract surgery. Other surgeries and injuries required more recovery time…and sometimes recovery was not complete.

The last road trip was for Thanksgiving in 2019…to be with a grandchild. Not long afterward the COVID-19 pandemic locked down travel and they discovered the comfort of ‘stay at home as much as possible.’ Recently they have transitioned to primary care practice that comes to their home for checkups, blood work and most other health needs. Their children and grandchildren come to them now. If they leave their home, it is a very special event. Four of their five grandchildren have college degrees – one has an MD…another a PhD. There aren’t any great-grandchildren – yet.

So many changes have occurred since they were born. Electricity and indoor plumbing were just beginning to be available on farms when they were born. They bought their first air-conditioned home in the early 1960s. Computers came along in the 1980s.

And now – my sisters and I are thankful they are still with us – still enjoying living independently in their home with support from the family, neighbors, doctors, and house cleaners – getting close to celebrating 70 years of married life.

Cancer Diary – Entry 4

After a two week wait, the appointment with the surgeon occurred. The office was in an area that I hadn’t been to before - part of a major academic institution with a surgeon that was a specialist in the type of surgery I needed. My husband accompanied me as a second set of ears. Neither one of us has prior experience with cancer or surgeries like I needed so we anticipated it would be a learning experience even though we had prepared ourselves by reading the information provided by my endocrinologist and following some of the references with internet searches.

The appointment lasted about 1.5 hours and most of the time was spent with the surgeon and his assistant talking. They explained the procedure…setting expectations – and answered questions. I had come with a few but there were no big surprises since we had done our ‘homework.’ The prognosis is very positive since the cancer was discovered early through the monitoring that had been part of my annual physical for the past 7-8 years. They did a couple of tests to hone the exact type of surgery needed…and then the last few minutes were with the scheduler. Their schedule is so busy that the surgery is almost 3 months out. Evidently there are a lot of these type surgeries happening right now – maybe because of a backlog that developed during the pandemic and prior to vaccine availability.

A few days before the appointment – I got family news that one of my aunts was in the hospital diagnosed with stage 4 cancer and the evening after my appointment I learned that she was in the process of being released – returning home under hospice care. She is only about 8 years older than me! I grieve that her life is ending….also grateful that my cancer is a more treatable kind with a very high survival/cure rate.

When I am thinking objectively, the reassurance from the doctors that 1) this type of cancer is one of the most treatable and 2) the delay is not problematic is believable; however, on an emotional level, I realize that I need to keep busy over the interim between now and mid-January to keep myself from becoming overly anxious. Before we got home from the appointment, I had already decided to make a 2-week road trip to Texas to see my family….and to do more decorating than I have in recent years for November and December. I was glad that my husband was with me and was supportive of what I wanted to do. I plan to visit my daughter during my road trip and there will be a public observing night at the university’s observatory on the first evening I am there…an opportunity for me to see her at work! (We did ‘take your daughter to work’ days when she was growing up….so this could be our first ‘take your mother to work’ event!)

30 years ago – October 1991

Looking back at the pictures from October 1991 – it was a pleasant month. Work was still challenging but not as overwhelming as it had been in the previous months. One of my sisters came to visit with the priority to enjoy activities with my two-year-old daughter. We went on a steam train trip near Gettysburg, visited a toy store in Ellicott City, and bought apples at a local orchard (my daughter ate an apple on the spot to the delight of the owner).  I remember the outing to Mount Vernon vividly. We had lunch in the restaurant with my daughter in a highchair (antique style) pushed up to the table; she was thrilled with the arrangement and enjoyed the meal tremendously…charmed the wait staff. Then we opted to not go through the house…enjoying the grounds thoroughly. She hugged a big tree that George Washington had planted!

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My sister was moving into a new house and had packed everything before her visit…and then moved almost immediately when she returned to Texas. It was a busy month for her. Another sister was pregnant with her second child and had some difficulties early in the month which were quickly resolved to the relief of the whole family. My parents were still working and trying to help everyone through the flurry of the month.

The leaves started to fall later in the month and my daughter became more enthusiastic than ever about being outdoors. Leaves and acorns are easily picked up and enjoyed. Her favorite movie was ‘Little Mermaid.’ She finally made the connection between saying numbers and counting things; that was the big ‘light bulb’ moment of her development in October 1991.

We borrowed a special costume for my daughter’s Halloween – a flowerpot for the body and headpiece with big yellow petals for around her face. It was very cute but not something she liked very much.  At that point in her life, she was not eating candy so there was little joy for her that Halloween!

Great memories from 30 years ago…

30 Years Ago – September 1991 (1)

Two big events happened in our family 30 years ago in September 1991 so I am doing two ‘30 years ago’ posts this month. The first was my daughter’s 2nd birthday. It stands out in my mind as the birthday celebration that included a full day of activities that she thoroughly enjoyed. The night before we looked at pictures from her first birthday…giving her some clues about what the day we be like.

She opened presents in 3 sessions. The first one included a wagon and we used it immediately to go to the neighborhood park. The day was sunny, 60-75 degrees, light breeze…. perfect weather to be outdoors. She loved the swings – particularly the tire swing which was new to her and required concentration to hold on as it went back and forth and around. As we walked home, we heard a big airplane noise and looked up and saw the Concorde (at that time it was flying into Dulles Airport to the south and west from where we lived in Maryland).

When we got home, we set up a tent in the back yard. She spent a lot of time going in and out the screen door…tickled that she could stand up in the tent while the adults had to sit.

After lunch, the next round of presents included bubbles and pipes. She enjoyed chasing the various kinds of bubbles all over the yard….and then heading to the house saying it was time for nap….which it was.

She took longer to wake up from her nap than usual….she was still a little sleepy for the third round of presents. She played with her new stuffed animals and toys – watched by the cat. We enjoyed a simple computer game with animal pictures and letters that we played (her on my lap saying the name of the animal and me doing the keyboard) – primitive by today’s standards!

The big finale after dinner as the strawberry ice cream butterfly cake and ‘2’ cookies. She was able to blow out her 2 candles! She didn’t like the icing on the cake – only at the strawberry part.

I had made the batch of ‘2’ cookies for her to share with the other children in her day care so she had munched on a few of those before her big day. They were a good size for her and not overly sweet. I’d purchased a set of number cookie cutters for this birthday intending to use them for subsequent birthdays, but I don’t remember using them again. I found a clipping of the recipe in my notes!

“2” cookies

1 cup butter, softened

1 cup sugar

1 large egg

1 tsp. baking powder

1 tsp vanilla

3 cups flour

Preheat oven to 400.  In a large bowl, cream butter and sugar with electric mixer.  Beat in egg and vanilla.  (I added food coloring at this point.)  Add baking powder and flour one cup at a time, mixing after each addition.  The dough will be stiff, blend in last flour by hand.  Do not chill dough.  Roll out dough to approximately 1/8 in. thick on a floured surface.  Dip cutters in flour before each use.  Bake cookies on ungreased cookie sheet on top rack of oven for 6-7 minutes or until cookies are lightly browned.   

Overall – a great birthday for a 2-year-old!

Summer Plans

My theme for this summer is catching up….and consciously maintaining practices that sustained my wellbeing during the pandemic. Being at home right now is such a pleasure: there are mornings cool enough to comfortably work in the yard or go for a hike, there are fabulous seasonal veggies and fruits available from the farmers market…and I am catching up on all the health-related checkups I put off for over a year. My husband organized our house’s heating/cooling system check up, asphalt driveway sealing, and deck re-staining. And I am continuing my high-volume book browsing (Internet Archive is like a candy store for books!), Zentangle making, getting 12,000 steps per day, a bit of yoga, writing down what I am celebrating/thankful for, writing blog posts….days are full…never boring!

Being able to go to Texas to see my aging parents in May was an important milestone…a relief from the time we had to stay at home where I could only see/hear them virtually. I’ve already planned another trip for July and will see more of the family then at a wedding. The big event for my parents after I left was a large mulberry tree being cut down in their yard. It had been ailing for some time and finally the rot around an old spilt was significant enough that the big trunks could crack apart at any time with the potential to damage three houses! My sister sent me a picture midway through the cleanup. I found myself wishing I would have been there for the drama! There is grief for the old tree….but also relief that it didn’t fall and cause a lot of damage.

Being vaccinated gives me confidence to make the plan to drive to Texas in July and then again in September. I had anticipated that I would be more confident in July that I was back in April just after I was fully vaccinated…but the delta variant has reduced my confidence and I’ll keep wearing a mask when I am not sure everyone I am encountering has been vaccinated. I’ll be making the drive over 3 days with a stop in Springfield MO to visit my daughter where they are having a surge of cases due to the variant. I am glad she got moved to her new house during the lull in cases in late May. She is back to curbside pickup rather than going into any store.

I have opted to not volunteer this summer…waiting until the fall to get back into those activities…but the decision isn’t because of the pandemic.  The type of volunteering I enjoy the most is outdoors; in the summer it tends to be in the hotter part of the day which is sometimes problematic for me; I don’t want to cancel at the last minute because the temperature is too high or the air quality is not good. Toward the end of the summer there will be training for the new fall programs – I’m sure the pandemic has changed them a bit – and then I’ll get back into the fray.

Overall summer 2021 has been enjoyable so far and I am looking forward to the rest of it!

30 years ago – June 1991

Looking back at June 1991 – it seems that life had a faster pace…almost an unsustainable pace but common in families where the adults work and the child is less than two years old. We had company for 2 weeks out of the month. The first was a visit from a sister that had recently moved into a new house and needed a break for the flurry of that activity; we enjoyed several outings to the park and Ladew Topiary Gardens…discovered that McDonalds was an excellent place for lunch with a 21-month-old.

The second visit was a sister’s family – that included their daughter (a week older than my daughter). We prepared the girls prior to the visit by showing them pictures and videos of each other; it worked…they were immediate buddies. We went to parks and several museums (one was The Cloisters which was a children’s museum then and is now a wedding venue, another was Rose Hill Manor Park & Museums)…read books, splashed in the small pool on hot days, and enjoyed every inch of our house and yard. One was talking more…the other seemed to enjoy more complex books. We all had ‘Maryland is for Crabs’ t-shirts! In the picture below my daughter is hugging a tree along the Cunningham Falls State Park boardwalk – one of the outdoor places that was enjoyable for everyone in our group.

Being outdoors…doing something with water…was one of my daughter’s favorite activities. We had tomato plants and gladiolus getting ready to bloom in the garden around the oak tree.

A summer cold made the rounds. My daughter had it for a few days…mine lingered and I eventually went to the doctor – got medicine for ear and eye infections.

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In world news – children in Iraq were dying of cholera and other water borne disease…the Kuwait fires were slowly being extinguished.

Overall – it was a month full of juggling work with home life. I can’t say that it was a balancing act…it was more of a blending and using every minute optimally…exhausting but rewarding.

By the end of the month, I already had plane tickets to visit Texas in July. My husband would be with us on the flight down then continue to San Diego for a conference…the blending rather than balancing strategy again.

Josey Ranch Swan Rebuilds

I went back to Josey Ranch Lake (Carrollton, TX) a few days after seeing the drowned swan nest – and discovered that the pair had rebuilt – higher this time – and one was sitting on the nest (maybe they already had a new egg)!

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The other swan was out on the lake – showing off a bit.

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My 90-year-old father was with me…enjoying looking through binoculars to see the swans and other birds as well as wildflowers. There were pigeons and grackles and mallards that are always around. The mallards were on the bank dabbling in the muddy areas of the grass. A male red-winged black bird made a lot of noise in a tree….making him easy to locate. Dad discovered that it was easier for him to hold the binoculars steady when he was sitting on one of the park benches.

The little blue heron was in the same place I had seen it last time and it appears that it is injured (wing)…benefiting from being close to the swans’ nest (the swans will drive away most predators) but it won’t last long if the injury won’t heal.

I saw a bird flush as a jogger went by and managed to zoom in to where it landed on a grassy berm. A killdeer! My dad couldn’t find it with the binoculars; the birds blend in very well. Once I looked away…I didn’t find it again with my camera either!

Getting ready to leave Texas….glad to see the swans on a new nest!

Carrolton TX Yard – Amaryllis

There is an amaryllis that blooms in a tiny patch of soil near the garage of my parents’ house. It blooms in late April/early May. I got to see it this year. It is a plant with more than a decade of history since it was purchased for my grandmother in the year or so before she died in 2010. It bloomed inside the first year then in the same place by the garage every year after that. This year there were three blooms in the first round for blooms….

And then a solitary one after the first 3 had faded. It looks so lonely facing the chain link fence into the back yard. I took it from the back…thinking about a child looking out a window on a rainy day….wishing to be on the other side of the pane.

A plant with an even longer history is on the other side of the garage – a rose bush given to my grandmother when she was 80. She lived to be 98 and enjoyed the roses every year….and my parents continue the tradition. The plant is close to 30 years old at this point!

Carrollton TX Yard – Fiddleheads

The ferns that flourish in the front flower bed of my parents’ house always surprise me. I think of the area being too dry in most places for ferns. They come back every year in the flower bed on the north (slightly west) flower bed where it is shady, and the sprinkler system keeps it wet enough. It is early in the growing season so there are fiddleheads among the fronds….and those are what I wanted to photograph.

I like the tight spiral at the tip…the expansion if the fronds from the base upward and the interesting coils that sometimes emerge as part of the frond unfurling. Fiddleheads are something I search out every spring. I missed my usual places in Maryland….so these are a welcome substitute and very convenient just outside the front door of my parents’ house!

Sandwiched

I am sandwiched between elderly parents and an early career daughter. Many of the articles about being in this situation seem to focus on the stress of being pulled between the two generations. My perception of it – so far – is how lucky I am…not the stress it might cause from time to time. Yes – I can’t be everywhere at once – but I am not the only one involved. I am married and have three sisters…all in the situation with me!

The distance between Maryland (me) and Texas (my parents) requires a two day drive…it’s slightly shorter but still 2 days to Missouri (my daughter’s). Flying is easier between my home and my parents since both are major cities; the flights to my daughters all require at least one stop.  Overall – it is a challenge to get to them fast. Virtual is helpful but not the same as being there in person.

I was fortunate that neither generation of my sandwich had an emergency during the pandemic. Traveling the distance quickly (driving or flying) is already a challenge…it would have been incredibly traumatic to not be able to travel at all; I’m glad we are all vaccinated now so the travel restriction is lifting.

The pandemic year has probably increased the need to travel to my parents more frequently. Maybe I will feel the pull more acutely…or not. I going to stay with the idea of savoring the time with both generations!

Hospital Experience

Most of my experiences at hospitals is associated with my parents getting older and needing support during hospitalization. A week ago, another one was history. My sister and I organized 24-hour shifts to support a 4 day stay in the hospital (we each had 2 shifts) and now are supporting follow up appointments and at-home PT. It’s a time requiring focus - overcoming a lot of emotion, anxiety, sleeping on somewhat uncomfortable converted couches, and boredom during long waits. My favorite activities to keep the boredom at bay are making Zentangle tiles, reading, and making notes about what is happening/what I was thinking about. I’ll post the tiles I made at the hospital in another post.

Vaccination makes quite a difference in our anxiety about COVID-19; the hospital allowed limited visitors. Mask wearing (except when eating) was required. My KF-94 mask was comfortable for the long hours of wear, but my ears were increasingly tender by the second 24 hours. I was relieved that there was no need for another long duration round of mask wearing. The only time I took my mask off for more than a few minutes in the hospital was once to eat a sandwich in an outdoor picnic area (lots of grackle calls…very windy).

I also took pictures from the hospital room and nearby lobby. There were two rooms last week. The first was in the ICU and on the 7th floor of the hospital. The roof below the window was somewhat decorative and the front of the hospital with the two columns of water was also visible.

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We moved out of the ICU in the middle of the night – up to the 10th floor and to the other end of the hospital. Note the different orientation of the two columns of water.

We had just settled into the new room…drifted off to sleep…when I heard a big noise and realized it was a helicopter. I sat up and saw it landing…noted that it was 2:10 AM…went back to sleep…the patient slept through everything. In the daylight – it was easy to see that the room looked down on the helipad for the hospital!

The height of the windows provided a good view of the Dallas skyline. I wondered how long it would take for the neat rows of trees planted at the front of the hospital to get big enough to be more forest like.

On my rare forays down to the 1st floor lobby for food – I realized that my favorite art along the long hall was a work that depicts wildflowers of Texas. Many of them have such distinctive shapes that they are identifiable in silhouette.

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Overall – the pandemic protocols did make this hospital stay a bit different (masks, limited visitors, less ‘stuff’ coming home) than our previous experience. The fundamental goal happened - the patient got better and came home. That is success.

Ten Little Celebrations – April 2021

My whole family has stayed well and the majority are now fully vaccinated….the big celebration for the month (and maybe the whole year).

2nd COVID-19 shot. It felt great to be a part of the potential ‘beginning of the end’ of the pandemic. Celebrating that I managed to not get the virus over the past year…and am now fully vaccinated.

Howard Country Conservancy Volunteering. It is a different type of volunteering than I did before but a little step back to doing outdoor volunteering that I enjoy. Celebrating being at Mt Pleasant in the spring.

Brookside Gardens tulips and wood thrush. Celebrating that I am able to see the springtime gardens this year.

South Mountain mini roadtrip. Celebrating that I was able to regain my confidence to dive on 70 mph speed limit highways.

Sunrise at Wegmans. Celebrating doing my own in person grocery shopping….at sunrise.

My daughter bidding on a beautiful house in Springfield. Celebrating my daughter and son-in-law finding a house they both like a lot (they are in the process of buying it now).

Carolina wren singing in the early morning. Every spring the birds are very vocal in our neighborhood. I celebrate hearing – and recognizing – their song.

Getting to Dickson TN. It was a long day of driving – over 13 hours. It was a relief – and celebration – when I finally got to the hotel room! And then getting on the road again a sunrise the next morning.

Seeing my parents again after more than a year. Celebrating family….coming out of the long distance separation the pandemic caused.

Josey Ranch and the Pocket Prairie. Celebration birds and wildflowers near my parents home.

30 years ago – April 1991

After the flurry of guests that we had in March 1991, we were back to being on our own in April….new challenges. My daughter was at a temporary family day care during the day for most of the month; it seemed to be working well but I rejoiced that not only did she remember her original day care provider after several weeks away, but she seemed thrilled to be back in that situation by the end of the month.

My husband was in the process of moving from Johns Hopkins to Applied Physics Lab for his work. It was a big ‘win’ in terms of work and a much shorter commute for him. We made a weekend trip to his Johns Hopkins office to move some items like plants and files. The heavier books were already on the way to the new office. We might have been the only people in the building. My daughter enjoyed pushing her stroller unimpeded in the hallways.

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I was traveling to Atlanta frequently for work and by the end of the month was quickly getting to a stopping point on that project so that I could start the next one which would involve a longer commute. There was an announcement about a ‘work from home’ pilot and I wondered if I would be able to participate to avoid the long commute at least one day a week.

The trips to Atlanta – sometimes done in a long day (intense meetings in the middle) – were the first travel I’d done for work since my daughter was born. It felt odd to be so far away from her. At the same time – I savored the quiet time on the plane - enjoying good books. I was using a card I’d received from my Grandmother as a bookmark. It took some effort to carry enough reading material with me on those trips….it made the briefcase heavy since this was well before electronic books!

It also seemed like there were more letters exchanged that April – mostly with family. Everyone seemed to have a busy month – travel to San Francisco for a class, 2 people moving, another getting pregnant, ducklings escaping their enclosure to make friends with dogs, and birthday celebrations. Reading about the flurry of activity was quite a contrast with our lives this year during the pandemic and, to a lesser extent, without the challenge of careers. There were lots of comments about how pretty the spring trees and flowers were; that hasn’t changed.

30 years ago – March 1991

The event of March 1991 that I remember without looking back at my notes of the month was my dad turning 60 years old. My notes helped fill in the details. He and my mother flew from Texas to Maryland to spend a week with us; 6 red balloons, a pair of Rockport dress shoes and a pecan praline ice cream cake were some ‘special’ things for the celebration. My 18-month-old daughter thoroughly enjoyed the week with them and the addition of the turtle sandbox to her ‘things to do outside.’ She enjoyed it just after it was purchased while it was still indoors – getting face to face with it (also note – one bare foot…the other with the shoe still on in the picture).

My husband and I benefited from the emotional support from that week. Both of us were going through work and health anxieties that improved over the next few months but peaked in March.

My daughter was facing challenges from us encouraging her to walk more on her own (even up and down stairs) and the beginning of ‘potty training.’ She wanted to be outside as much as possible. She still liked to pick up leaves to carry around while she explored.

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She was not talking well but increasingly more opinionated about what she wanted (and didn’t). She enjoyed carrying around her toys and dancing. The family day care provider commented that she enjoyed dancing so much that once she started…all the other children danced with her.

Near the end of the month – while my parents were visiting, my family day care provider let me know that her mother who had been with her for the past 6 months had died and that the day care would be closed for the next few weeks. I quickly found other day care for the interim; the visit of my parents helped the temporary transition to the other day care. I’ll always be glad that my daughter had the attention of the older woman for those few months…extra attention and cuddles are so important for young children (and often an joy of older adult to provide). When I arrived to get my daughter in the afternoons, it always seemed like she was either being held by or standing close to the older woman; when they made eye contact it was obvious: they had a special bond.

And now – moving ahead 30 years – my dad will be celebrating his 90th birthday! Hopefully, the pandemic situation will improve with more vaccinations and I’ll be able to see him soon.

30 years ago – January 1991

In January 1991 – we went down to the Smithsonian on the 1st. I didn’t note which museums we saw…just that our 16-month-old daughter walked across the mall on her own – stopping to exam interesting pebbles and clumps of grass, etc.

We had more snow that January than we have this year. There are pictures of our daughter sledding down the driveway in a plastic tub; her snowsuit is a little tight and she does not look happy at all…maybe because I forgot to put on her mittens! She was much happier indoors eating spaghetti.

Her new skill was taking off her shoes and socks. Her father called me one morning after I’d gotten to work with the news that I was going to have to do something about her…he had gotten her ready to go to day care and was putting on his coat…turned around to discover that her shoes and socks were not on her feet anymore! Her day care provider said the same thing happened all day long. Once she discovered she could do it – we all had to be patient until the novelty wore off…or her feet grew a little and the shoes were not as easy to pull off. I also started putting her in tights, so she had at least one layer on her feet.

We all enjoyed the Cats musical that we taped from PBS. Our daughter made the connection between the characters of the show and our cat. The cat slept through most of the video viewings.

My husband and it were worried about events in the Middle East (Desert Storm); after the Berlin Wall came down in 1989, there had been such hope that the world was heading toward a better time, but the optimism did not last. I was feeling the physical distance between where I lived in Maryland with the rest of my family in the Dallas just as I am now. Maybe it was a little better in 1991 because I could travel – not something that can happen in January 2021.